Baby Name

A note found scribbled on a napkin:

"Three criteria for our baby's name:
1- something simple, like us
2- something short and sweet, like you,
3- could you call this name to supper.
ex. "Time for dinner Abdujaporov!""


So far the biggest psychological issue that we've had to confront regarding the birth is what we are going to name the little one. Our name debate has continued for months and I don't think its a good use of time. Resources could be better allocated. I'm beginning to wish the government would provide us with names when they issue the social security number. Why's it called a baby name when eventually that name will have to be worn by an adult too? This belies the seriousness of it all.

The evolution of Ann and I's naming is rather interesting. We started by considering names from any source and so I surfed websites with names from the globe over. European names, Scottish and Germanic names for heritage considerations, even Indian, Arabic, and names of past astronauts, beautiful Italian cities, famous pre-War cyclists. I made up names and toyed with the spelling of existing names: Ann likes Natale, but I like Natale with a G. Gnat, for short. Last month I promised Jon that I'd name my first born after the winner of the 2008 Tour de France and was relieved that Sastre beat out Shleck, but its still not easy even though I like it or one of its derivations: Sastre/Sastra/Sastro/Sastri. What about Sylvan Chavanel Reid.

I'm tired of this naming game and wonder if giving the toddler initials to start is enough and when its of a suitable age it can fill in the blanks. The problem is that this difficulty won't go away and it would just be passing on this hardship. Part of the problem is that Annie and I are considering any potential name or word in existence and its just way too vast and impenetrable of a task and so I am beginning to understand why people tend to perpetuate the same names and pass them down through the eons. Its easier to use a family name from one of your great grandparents because you don't have to explain how you came up with the name, nor do you have to wade through

What's in a name, anyhow, and who really cares. I ponder this when the weight of giving an amazing creature a stupid little moniker for the rest of its existence hits me.

I don't really subscribe to the Boy Named Sue factor, which is that a name can make you other than you are (although maybe it actually could make you tougher in the absence of a strong parental influence like my right arm). In my opinion the baby makes the name. Growing up didn't you know someone in grade school with a name like Penelope or Sylvester and you wondered how they got away with being in the circle of cool kids?

And so why bother coming up with boy names and girl names, and instead just come up with one name suitable for either-or? After all, I don't plan to treat the kid differently or provide it with alternative opportunities depending upon whether it is a boy or a girl, so why start it off with a name that immediately type casts it? Pat Francis Reid is my choice: its got a gender inspecific first name and a homage to family. Doug Jr won't do.